Archives: f’in beauty

BEAUTY ON THE CHEAP // rose hip seed oil

let us be the first to admit, we started off as skeptics when this whole “rub oil on your face; it’s good for your skin” thing became a beauty trend. having been cursed with extremely oily and acne prone skin, we have always been the types more drawn to products that promise to dry up blemishes and eliminate shine. it took us about 6 articles touting the benefits of rose hip seed oil, this huffington post write-up, and finally the urgings of both our mother and miranda kerr before we finally decided to give this $7 wonder a try.

well guys, we’ve given it a shot. and we’re beliebers. we first started testing this product on small, inconspicuous patches of our jawline each night to make sure it wouldn’t cause our skin to go ape shit. after a week of that with no issues, we decided to go for the full rub down – still taking care to avoid any broken out areas. because rubbing oil on top of acne has to be a bad idea, right? well we got even ballsier a few nights after that and started smearing it right on top of our break out areas, and an incredible thing happened – it actually IMPROVED our blemishes by morning.

we highly recommend going to get you some of this miracle product – it’s a natural acne & eczyma treatment, it moisturizes like crazy, and it has tons of antioxidants and vitamins that repair skin cells while you sleep (it’s also a great follow-up moisturizer to one of our other favorite skincare steals, the aztec clay mask).

if you’ve ever found yourself sitting around, gazing up at the sky and spending countless minutes pondering the far-reaching history and profound nature of black eyeliner, we’re here today to tell you that you are not alone. in fact, it’s not even just the 2 of us standing here next to you in noir-rimmed wonderment. when we first read the article eyeliner: the time-honored makeup choice of bad girls everywhere in the new york times’ T magazine (sent to us by a friend who knows of our devotion to that magical smoky stuff), we felt a sense of belonging to a certain bad bitches club, of women just like us who understood the power of the bold black line.

we were reminded of our days spent tirelessly searching for the best black eyeliner – one that was easy to apply in a perfect cat eye, would stay put all day long, and wouldn’t make our damn eyes water the minute we stepped out of the house. pencils make us feel like we’re dragging a scalpel along the base of our lids, and liquids are too unforgiving. but we finally found the ideal solution, and it would be plain selfish of us to keep it to ourselves.

best black eyeliner | worthy splurge: mac fluidline

women of the world, we give you mac fluidline in blacktrack. this stuff can give you anything from a demure little  line to a full blown cat eyed wing, and at $16, it’s a splurge you basically owe it to yourself to make. welcome to the bad bitches club.

best black eyeliner | worthy splurge: mac fluidline


beauty on the cheap: natural aztec clay facial mask

if you’re like us, you’ve heard hundreds of rave reviews of the facials your bougie friends have received in beverly hills. wonderful, you say. i want to acquire a radiant face while listening to enya too, you say. how much does it cost? “it’s $200 but soooo worth it!” your bougie friend replies.

suddenly this hoodrat is sounding sillier to you by the minute. all we know is if we have an extra couple hundos laying around, it’s going toward a rebecca minkoff clutch or some exotic vanilla we need to bake those cute little cookies martha stewart just pinned…but we digress.

here’s where we tell you that if your skin needs some TLC on a budget, you can look no further than your nearest whole foods or trader joe’s for an amazing facial that will only set you back $8. yes, $8. and yes, it really works. when our favorite model-we-pretend-to-be-friends with girl crush allie crandell instagrammed a pic of aztec secret clay, we knew it had to be good. so we picked up a jar of it at whole foods for $6 and dropped another $2 on organic apple cider vinegar to mix it with. because we do what allie crandell tells us to do.

cheap natural beauty clay facial mask

a tiny amount of apple cider vinegar + clay will be enough for your whole face

the beauty of this mask is that you need only the tiniest teensiest amount of the dry clay for a single facial — we’re about 10 masks deep in ours and the jar is still 3/4 full. to create your facial, mix your teensy serving of the clay with some apple cider vinegar (again, not too much, you just want enough so that it looks like a suspicious paste). now that you have a paste, rub that shit all over your face — you want it to be pretty thick (ahem…that’s what she said).

here’s the deal, ladies. we’ve all seen too many rom coms where the female lead puts on a facial mask in front of her romantic interest and tee-hee oh-em-gee, he nearly proposes to her on the spot, suddenly overwhelmed with affection for this ponytailed down-to-earth girl and her perfectly imperfect messiness.

we’re telling you now, this is not the mask to pull that shit with. after you’ve rubbed the paste onto your face, for the next 15-20 minutes you will watch in morbid fascination as you morph into the elephant man. let us tell you, it is certainly not cute and it certainly does not make you a rachel mcadams-esque perfectly quirky beauty. lock the damn door to your bathroom and don’t let anyone in, especially not any man you’re hoping will want to sleep with you in the near future.

actual forehead skin texture. we are not fucking with you.

actual forehead texture. we are not fucking with you.

once it’s dry and you look thoroughly horrifying, you can rinse it off with warm water. don’t be scared if your skin looks a little red; the clay is supposed to do that, and we promise it’ll fade within about 30 minutes. be sure to follow up with your favorite moisturizer.

keep up a routine of 1-2 masks per week and voila, your skin will soon be silky smooth and blemish free, all for the cost of about 25 cents per clay-and-vinegar facial. it’s a christmas miracle! now go forth and prosper (alone. we mean it. seriously, don’t put this shit on in front of your boyfriend thinking he’ll be charmed — we’ll bet you still believe in santa clause too don’t you).

your skin will be smooth as a rachel mcadams' bottom in no time using the aztec clay method

your skin will be smooth as a rachel mcadams’ bottom in no time using the aztec clay method